Hello, my dear readers, followers, friends, and other random people on the internet. Today was indeed busy, but I wouldn’t classify it as long. In fact, I feel a lot better having talked to Charon about my shit week and my shut down and my gender shit. For the record, I want to say that I don’t mind being called she/he/him/her/his. I don’t like being called a lady. I am not a lady. I am not a woman. I’m on the fence on ‘they’ because I just figured out that ‘they’ can also be used as a singular. I feel like a moron and will apologize to Charon next week for being a dumb bacon butt.
I did ask Charon for clarification on what she had wanted me to do because I was lost on the homework. It turns out, she was trying to convey that I tend to dress more alternate ’emo’ rather than dress like the typical mainstream person. That’s what she meant. I completely took things the wrong way and honed in on the words and not exactly the meanings. So, I want to apologize to you lot for spreading misinformation and causing further confusion and tumultuous emotions on that matter. Charon does like my hair and has no problem with how I dress. I just don’t dress like what most people would think of a country ‘bumpkin’ to dress. I’m not sure that’s an actual word, but it makes me think of if a pumpkin and a potato had a baby.
So, to clarify: Charon did not mean to come off as hurtful. She had no idea that I was taking her words quite literally and was trying to show me that I dress ’emo’. I thought I was over the emo look, but whatever. It’s not that big of a deal to me. We did discuss my nonbinary status a bit and I said it’s pretty much a non-issue, so long as people fucking stop calling me a lady. I am not a lady. I am a gentleman.
We went over a few things on this list (link) of female Asperger traits a bit. I’m not entirely sure why we did, but we did. I would like to take a few of the things on that list, such as social interactions being hard, and work on them in therapy. I asked if I could have the paper copy she gave me to keep and she said yes. I like paper copies of stuff versus digital copies. Same with books.
And then group. Oh my various heathen gods, group was difficult. I hadn’t done the homework and I didn’t even try to pretend to have done it. I straight up said that I didn’t do it because I was being a little shit and then I continued to be a little shit and not stay on task. Holy shamrock shake, what the fuck, Sarcastic Autist? Just… What the fuck. I don’t know why I get so anxious in group settings and that bothers me.
Anyway, so we were learning about how to accumulate long-term positive experiences. The homework for this week is to take a core value we have and break it down into bite size pieces. I want to write it out longhand before I attempt to put it up here and explain fully what it is we talked about because it’s a complicated thing. I’m sure you all will understand it, that’s not the issue. My issue is being able to convey what I mean without sounding like a potato.
So, short update. I’m terribly sorry again. I hope you all have a wonderful evening/day/morning/time of the angry red circle in the sky.
-The Sarcastic Autist