I ended up not really talking to Charon about much today. We talked a lot about books and I made her listen to the Raining Tacos song. Mostly because I was anxious as fuck and had gotten an unsettling text from my godmother about how she’s switching churches this morning. I had also gotten a message from someone on my dating site so I had called Kuma-chan at fuck o’clock in the morning. (Fuck o’clock is around the asscrack of dawn, in case you are wondering).
I’m feeling drained. I spent a majority of the day either in a state of anxiety or a state of shame or a state of guilt or a state a general uneasy. I feel like I’m sorely in need of a break again and I have an appointment with physical therapy tomorrow, my godmother is still doing bible study so I’m going to go to that on Wednesday. Thank my various heathen gods that I have Thursday off, but Friday I have to go shopping for food and things and Okaasan said she’d take me to Whole Foods since it’s my birthday and I can get a thing of gluten free vegan cheez-it knock offs and some other vegan foods. Also I’m going to look for ramen.
And Saturday I’ve got this thing at church that’s an all day event. Sunday, I’m not sure if I’ll attend this new church with my godmother or not. I don’t like new things.
Amidst all of this, I want to finish my current book, Quiet, start The Places That Scare You, hopefully get that Exposure Therapy book in the mail, write a comprehensive goal/treatment plan for therapy so Charon and I have a better idea of what I want to get done, and write about Soul Mold and Soul Seeds so I can articulate those ideas better.
Oh, and also study my Japanese for at least an hour everyday. And do some yoga to get back into that practice.
I’m feeling so overwhelmed right now.
-The Sarcastic Autist