I haven’t had the energy or the motivation to come on and post. I’m sorry for that.
Trauma therapy take 3 starts next Thursday. Charon and I have started and stopped for various reasons. This time we are doing a trauma therapy that’s based on DBT. Marsha Linehan, the woman who started DBT, created this just recently. There isn’t even any literature on it for me to read.
I’m going to really have to try harder than I have been. I don’t know how, but I’m going to have to dig real deep inside and use all my courage and strength to get this shit done. Charon said it should only take about 13 weeks for this new therapy. 13 sessions. I’m both thrilled and anxious and highly skeptical that it’ll take only 13 weeks for me to get better, but I’m also ready and willing to give it a shot.
I’ve been having nonstop nightmares about my ex. You would think I would be having nightmares about the Thing, the rape, since it’s getting closer and closer to the anniversary. But I’m not. I’m having them about my ex and my aunt and uncle when I was living with them and my dad. I find that all really rather silly.
Flapjack and I are still going strong. We’ve been together for over 6 months now. Still haven’t met up. I am planning on going over to the U.K. to see her during the week of Thanksgiving since I hate Thanksgiving and really want to use her as an excuse to skip out on family time.
I’ve been avoiding my aunt and uncle a lot more recently. I’ve been coming up with nonstop excuses for not going over for birthdays and holidays. My main reason is that I don’t feel safe over there and I always feel terrible by the time I get home.
Oh, I have purchased Vibes Ear Filters. They work great. I want to purchase another pair so I can have one at home and keep one in my bag. I really recommend them.
I’m struggling with my weight and my eating disorder and I was just put back on the pill because my cooch is bleeding again when it shouldn’t be. I’ve gained a bit of weight (probably from eating so much salty foods to help my low blood pressure) and I’ve been doing a weird binge/restrict cycle and I’ve got a FitBit. (Charge 2). I love my FitBit. It does not help with my ED.
There’s not much more to tell. I’ve started learning how to play Magic the Gathering and I joined a Dungeons and Dragons group. I’m still studying Japanese (just started N1). I’m obviously still doing therapy.
I’m going to be trying to come on and blog more. Blogging really helps me process things better. I also just miss it.
The Sarcastic Autist