I got almost 3 full hours of sleep last night. Nightmares. Mostly about living with my aunt and uncle and living at the house I grew up in. A few other things thrown in too. I still have no idea what to do next in therapy. It’s a start though. And for the record, tons of good stuff has happened to me too. I was just focusing on the scary or traumatizing bits for the most part.
Writing was very cathartic. I shut down at various parts and got so sad I cried a bit on others. Looking back to the girl I used to be, I feel bad. My heart breaks for younger me. If it were anyone else telling me these things that happened to them, I would be crying and outraged at the injustice done to them.
There’s a song I like by Icon for Hire called You Can’t Kill Us. It’s a very good song and it gives me a sense of strength and courage to keep on going.
I can’t remember if I told you guys, but I’m trying to remember the huge blanks in my memory. I didn’t put anything down that I have been remembering lately because I need to fact check it, make sure it ain’t a Drop Bear thing.
I don’t have anything else to say right now. I’m going to go finish getting ready for therapy.
-The Sarcastic Autist
the sarcastic autist 